Tales from the Trunk

Hello, dear listeners!
 
I wanted to give you all an update about the show. To whit: I’m taking a bit of a break. The last five seasons have been incredible, and season six has been and will continue to be.
 
Tales from the Trunk is in no way ending. We will be back on September 20th, when I’ll be talking to T. Kingfisher.
 
In the mean time, here are some of the things that I have been enjoying from the wider media landscape:
 
A podcast: Friends at the Table – their eighth season, Palisade, is coming to a close right now, and it has been a Ride.
A book: Bury Your Gays, by Chuck Tingle – you already know how much I loved Camp Damascus, and it should come as no surprise that the good doctor’s follow-up is every bit as incredible.
A TV show: Hunter × Hunter (2011) – Just a fantastic shōnen anime.
And a musical twofer: Chappel Roan – come on. I’m queer. She writes good pop hooks. Suggested tracks: “Pink Pony Club” and “My Kink is Karma”
Porter Robinson – if you like bouncy but also emotional EDM, give him a go. Suggested tracks: “Knock Yourself Out XD” and “Shelter”
 
Thanks again for your support over the years, and I look forward to returning in two months with even more amazing interviews with incredible guests.

This time around, it’s my delight to welcome to the show Aliette de Bodard! Aliette joins me to talk about her new novella, Navigational Entanglements, available July 30th, 2024, from TorDotCom Books!
 
Things we mention in this episode:
 
C dramas
Heaven’s Official Blessing, by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu
Xianxia
Camp Damascus, by Chuck Tingle
“The Tutelary, the Assassin, and the Healer,” by Aliette de Bodard in I Want That Twink Obliterated
Worldcon
Sarahs Gailey and Hollowell
Dead Boy Detectives and The Sandman, by Neil Gaiman
The Saint of Bright Doors, by Vajra Chandrasekera
Chronicles of Elantra, by Michelle Sagara
Aliette’s bluesky, insta, website, and patreon

Hello, and welcome to Tales from the Trunk.
 
Listeners, it’s June, and ya boi is tired. I was going to try to scramble to get an interview scheduled, but then I remembered the name of a Shavuot workshop that a dear friend of the show attended last year: “What if we Rested?”
 
Life has been nonstop for me for more than half a year now, so what if I rested? What if we all rested? Goodness knows that if you’re not a white cishet allo abled person, you need it.
 
But also, I wanted to do something. So I’m bringing you something old and something—well, another old thing, actually, but one that hasn’t appeared here before. First, here is an essay that I wrote for Trans Day of Visibility a few years ago, and after that, a short collection of essays that first aired here in June of 2020. I hope you enjoy them.
 
Visibility
 
honestly i’ve been sitting on this for a grip and just not quite knowing how to fit the words together, but i’m tired, y’all. so, visibility. of trans people, specifically.
 
it’s me. i’m trans people.
 
it took me a long time to understand that about myself, and i didn’t come to it on my own. i needed help. i needed to see that “trans” was a word that could describe me.
 
when i was little, i knew that i was weird. that i didn’t fit. that i didn’t act like the other little boys. that there were parts of me that i had to learn to hide to keep myself safe. that i couldn’t talk about with anyone because i didn’t have the language to capture it.
 
when i was in ninth grade, one of our history teachers came out as trans. we had an assembly where an administrator told us all that our teacher was a man now, that his pronouns were he/him, probably that misgendering him wouldn’t be tolerated. but he didn’t look like me.
 
i had a distant friend in high school who came out as trans. he didn’t look like me, either.
 
years before she came out as trans, my closest friend at school told me that she was bisexual. she was the first bi person i knew i knew. we would go to goth clubs and she would make out with people while i danced or stood against the wall and nodded my head along. even before we were really friends, i was drawn to her, wanted to be her friend more than anything. we went through a lot of hard times together, but she didn’t look like me.
 
she pierced my ears after high school. four holes i carry to this day, a little part of her with me all the time even though we haven’t seen each other in a decade.
 
in college, my friend asked that we use neopronouns for them, then they/them. the neopronouns were hard. we were young. i knew so many queer people in college, so many trans people. none of them looked like me.
 
that same friend came out to me and my spouse as genderqueer sometime before our wedding. i think that was the first time i’d heard the word. but i didn’t know it was something that could belong to me. not yet.
 
i “came out” to a friend one summer night while i was in college. we were driving to get snacks after a day of endless quaker committee meetings. i said that i’d only ever fallen for women before, but that i was open to the possibility that wouldn’t always be the case. i was in my first actual relationship then. years later, my ex came out as nonbinary. i didn’t think about that coming-out conversation again for a long time.
 
i came out as bi to my cat while i was driving her to the vet for dental surgery. she was upset because she was in the car, but i knew that she was someone i could trust with my “secret.” it wasn’t for another few weeks that i came out to my spouse and a few of my friends. i used to think of outness as a binary, even though it’s always been a spectrum. i’m out to some of my coworkers, mostly other queers, but not others. it’s not worth the discomfort. or it’s choosing the lesser of two levels of discomfort.
 
one time, my boss at the time said “everyone here is straight” in a meeting. he wore a rainbow strap on his apple watch in june. he’d like you to know that he’s an ally. i felt deeply uncomfortable about not saying anything, but also deeply uncomfortable about the idea of saying something. after i left that job, a former coworker confided in me that this boss pulled some classic cishet white dude stuff with them. i felt grateful that i hadn’t outed myself in that meeting long ago.
 
i found a copy of Maia Kobabe’s Gender Queer at a bookstore the same summer that i left that job and bought it on the spot. i just thought it was neat. i knew that i needed it.
 
i read that book in a single sitting. i’ve re-read it more times than i can count since then.
 
Maia didn’t look like me, but i still saw myself in eir experiences in a way that i hadn’t experienced before. e was queer. queer as in weird. queer as in didn’t get social expectations for eir assigned gender. queer as in, well, queer.
 
a month or two later, i got a tattoo of a jackalope on my arm, but if you look closely, you’ll see that it’s a bunny wearing a pair of antlers that are tied on under their chin. when i designed the tattoo, i explained that that was about live-action roleplaying. maybe i believed it? but that’s not what it was really about, was it?
 
i had a gender crisis in 2020 at the start of the lockdown. if i’m being honest, i’d been having a gender crisis for years, quietly, tucked in the pages of journals hidden away where i didn’t have to look at them. but suddenly, it was just two adult humans and two cats all alone in a house, doing their grocery shopping at first light, uncomfortable with the idea of other people in a new way.
 
there was a lot of gender going around then.
 
i came out as genderqueer to my cat while i was driving her to another appointment. maybe you’re sensing a theme. she knows my secrets, but she’ll never talk.
 
i came out to my partner. it was easier, in some ways, and harder in others. “i’m attracted to more than one gender” is much more straightforward than “i’m genderqueer, but my pronouns are he/him, but my experience of gender is ????” i talked to my few close nonbinary friends about it. that really helped, because we had a shared vocabulary of “gender? what the fuck?”
 
i came out to my therapist.
 
he just didn’t get it. he was an older cishet white man. in one of our last sessions, he said that we should talk more about my gender. with my spouse’s help, i broke up with him and found a new therapist before i had to go through that ordeal. my new therapist is queer. she asked me what pronouns to use for me in our first session and told me to tell her if that changed. i started using he/they, then they/he, then just they/them pronouns within a couple months. not everywhere at first, but most places.
 
bigots started challenging Gender Queer earlier this year, or maybe at the end of last year. who knows when? time is fake. they call it pornographic. they call it smut.
 
i call it lifechanging.
 
it wasn’t until i was in my 30s that i started to see queer people who looked like me. it wasn’t until i read a memoir by a person whose early life experiences mirrored my own that i really learned language to talk about myself.
 
i like where i am in my life. yes, i’m anxious, and we’re all still out here with this pandemic and a global rise in fascism, but i know a lot more about myself, understand a lot more about myself at 35 than i did at 30, at 25, at 20. but that doesn’t stop me from wondering what my life might have looked like if i’d seen people like me when i was growing up.
 
i can’t change my past, but i can be visible for today’s kids. maybe some weird little boy will see me in the grocery store and gain some understanding that he didn’t have before. maybe a nonbinary teen will feel safer just existing knowing that they’re not alone. that’s what we mean when we talk about “trans visibility.” that’s why it’s important. because trans visibility produces trans adults, but trans invisibility produces miserable people, miserable kids. or dead ones.
 
trans visibility, queer visibility, is lifesaving.

We’re kicking off Pride this year with none other than my good friend Jay Wolf! Jay reads a snippet about their best worst boys, Egan and Petrel before we get to talking about their newest book as M. Daniel McDowell, The Shepherd in Shadow, which releases June 28th!
 
Things we mention in this episode:
 
Valerie Valdes
The Gormenghast series, by Mervyn Peake
Inkfort Press Self-Publishing Derby
Bringer of the Scourge, by M. Daniel McDowell
Glen Cook
Fritz Leiber
Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser
The Colour of Magic and Hogfather, by Terry Pratchett
Beating Hearts & Battle Axes
New Edge Sword & Sorcery Magazine
Julie Bell and Boris Vallejo
M.E. Morgan
X-Men ‘97
Forged in Fire
Jay’s socials and M. Daniel McDowell’s socials

This time around, I’m thrilled to welcome to the show Meg Elison! Meg reads to us from the start of their trunked novel, Hemet, which leads us into a wonderful conversation about a whole host of topics, including her own artist’s statement on spooky stuff.

This time around, it’s my delight to welcome back to the show Victor Manibo! After a bit of catching up, we get into Victor’s new book, Escape Velocity, which releases later this month from Erewhon Books!
 
Things we mention in this episode:
 
The Sleepless, by Victor Manibo
Victor’s first episode
“The Cask of Amontillado,” by Edgar Allan Poe
The Fall of the House of Usher (show)
Gravity (2013)
Funeral and Neon Bible, by Arcade Fire
COWBOY CARTER and RENAISSANCE, by Beyoncé
Shōgun (TV series) based on the novel by James Clavell
Game of Thrones
Our Share of Nights, by Mariana Enriquez
ICFA
Victor’s website, twitter, insta, tiktok, fb, and substack
 
Stick around next time when my guest will be Meg Elison!

In addition to the regular strong language, this episode carries content warnings for: reclaimed gay slurs; a non-graphic depiction and discussion of non-consensual sex; depictions of consensual violence; and discussions of attempted suicide, medical trauma, experiences of psyche wards, descriptions of psychosis, forcible medication, restraint, experiences of homelessness, alcoholism, and body horror. The non-consensual sex and the consensual violence are both depicted in the reading, which is 24 minutes long, and there is some further discussion of the events from the reading following it. Perhaps even more so than usual, listener discretion is advised.
 
This time around, it is my complete gremlin pleasure to welcome to the show Ivy Fox! Together, we perform the entirety of her play, Strapped, which leads us into a wide-ranging conversation that touches on collaborative art, anime girls, furry music, mental health, and so much more. Seriously, this episode is over two hours long. We just kept talking!
 
Things we mention this episode:
 
Sarah Gailey
Friends at the Table
Toronto Fringe
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Firefly
JRPG
Magic: the Gathering
Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat, by Samine Nosrat
Chuck Tingle
“Trust the Process,” by Hilary B. Bisenieks in Stone Soup
Machine Girl
The Mad Bird
Kirby’s Return to Dream Land
US Trans Survey
Rev (blue liquor)
Madness and Civilization, by Michel Foucault
Death of the author
The Legend of Zelda
AO3
Warrior Cats series, by Erin Hunter
This tumblr post
The Matrix
Splatoon 3
MahjongSoul
All Our Yesterdays, by Hilary B. Bisenieks
“Chain Bastard”
Metallic Rouge
Blade Runner
Dungeon Meshi
Hunter x Hunter
Hisoka
Slay the Princess
Revolutionary Girl Utena
Together We’ll Shine 
Conflict is Not Abuse, by Sarah Schulman
Voidreckon, by Mittsies
Techdog 1-7, by Patricia Taxxon
I WANT TO LOVE AGAIN, by doefriends
Watership Down, by Richard Adams
Ivyfoxart [at] gmail [dot] com, Ivy’s cohost and ko-fi
Soul Mates! on cohost
Doctor Fanfiction’s Monster
Tableturf Battle
Media Club Plus

This time around it is my absolute delight to welcome John Wiswell back to the show to talk about his debut novel, Someone You Can Build a Nest In, which just released this very week! We talk about John’s favorite bits both in and no longer in the book, along with conversation about language, games, and a surprise musical performance!
 
Things mentioned in this episode:
 
Premee Mohamed
Sarah Gailey
Caitlin Starling
“D.I.Y.” by John Wiswell
“Open House on Haunted Hill” and its Japanese cover
Katakana and Hiragana
Hunter x Hunter (2011)
Media Club Plus
Starred review in The Library Journal
Merc Fenn Wolfmoor
“This is Not a Wardrobe Door,” by Merc Fenn Wolfmoor
Sickos yes
4th Street Fantasy
Worldcon
John Scalzi
Ted Chiang
Martha Wells
Chuck Tingle
The Simpsons
The Arcadia Project trilogy, by Mishell Baker
Camp Damascus, by Chuck Tingle
Miri Baker
Tom Bombadil
Howard Tayler
Writing Excuses
Schlock Mercenary
Brandon Sanderson
Mary Robinette Kowal
Maurice Broaddus
Dongwon Song
Reservation Dogs
Holly, by Stephen King
Vacíos Cuerpos
Balatro
The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom
Baldur’s Gate 3
Roguelike
Deck-builder
Calvinball
Hades
Friends at the Table Balatro stream
Austin Walker
Twilight Mirage and Spring in Hieron soundtracks
Bandcamp
Deep-fried jpegs
Is It Bandcamp Friday?
Web 1.0
John’s twitter, bluesky, insta, patreon, and substack
Escape Velocity, by Victor Manibo

This time around, it’s my pleasure to welcome longtime friend of the show Laura Blackwell! Laura reads to us from her very very trunked story, “Poor Prisoners,” which leads us into a wide-ranging discussion of things we wish we’d learned sooner, writers whose work we admire, and kindness to our past selves.
 
Things we mention in this episode:
 
Story Hour
LiveJournal
Dreamwidth
Macey’s Murderboard episode
All Our Yesterdays, by Hilary B. Bisenieks
Quaker Spec Fic issue
AO3
Omegaverse
The Iliad and Odyssey, by Homer, translated by Emily Wilson
Beowulf translated by Seamus Heaney and Maria Dahvana Headley
Grimms’ Fairy Tales
Lattimore, Fitzgerald, Fagles Homers
The Aeneid, by Virgil, translated by Robert Fagles
Paradise Lost, by John Milton
Translation State and the Imperial Radch trilogy, by Ann Leckie
The Djinn Waits a Hundred Years, by Shubnum Khan
Archival Quality, by Ivy Noelle Weir and Steenz
The Mütter Museum
Ivy’s episode
Just Like Home, by Sarah Gailey
The Death of Jane Lawrence, Last to Leave the Room, Yellow Jessamine, and The Luminous Dead, by Caitlin Starling
Megan E. O’Keefe
Megan’s first episode
Steve Toase
Amanda Cook
Jo Miles
SFWA
HWA
Premee Mohamed
She Walks in Shadows, edited by Silvia Moreno-Garcia and Paula R. Stiles
Beneath the Rising, And What Can We Offer You Tonight, The Annual Migration of Clouds, and The Butcher of the Forest, by Premee Mohamed
System Collapse, by Martha Wells
Yuletide (fic exchange)
The Red River of the north
Lake Agassiz
Marie Brennan
Martha Wells
Ursula Vernon
Chuck Tingle
Sarah Gailey
Hugo Awards thing
Stoker Awards
Edenville, by Sam Rebelein
Camp Damascus, by Chuck Tingle
Hellraiser
Death Note manga, netflix, and anime
Potato chip eating scene
Death Note: The Musical
Laura’s website, bluesky, twitter, insta, mastodon
 
Join me next month when I’ll be talking to John Wiswell and Ivy Fox

To open this show’s sixth season, it is my total delight to welcome A.D. Sui to talk about her forthcoming novella, The Dragonfly Gambit, available later this year!
 
Things we mention in this episode:
 
Neon Hemlock Press
dave ring
:unhinged_vibrating:
:shaking_eyes:
Fix-it fic
Fanfiction dot net
Even Though I Knew the End book tour episode
Supernatural
Carl Engle-Laird
100th episode
Jared can’t read vine
Blue Eye Samurai
Family Guy
Rick and Morty
Anna’s twitter, insta, bluesky, and website
John Wiswell
Ursula T. Kingfisher Vernon